Trace Parker's birth story- the unabridged version

I feel like this post should come with a warning, as so many of my posts seem to do.  Please note, this is the UNabridged version, so it's length and may be too much information for your taste.  This is for those that want to hear all the details of our firstborn's birth, and for me.. so I don't forget a single detail!  Don't say I didn't warn you.

Our world changed forever on March 15th.  I'm not talking about the impact of this date on all of civilization. The Ides of March- Once a day on the Roman calendar that held several religious observances, then it became notorious as the date of the assassination of Julius Caesar in 44 BC. The death of Caesar made the Ides of March a turning point in Roman history.  But  I am referring to a different turning point in history-- the unimaginable difference that March 15, 2013 made on me-- the birth of Trace Parker Morgan! The day I went from being "wife", "sister", "daughter", "fund development specialist" to being the only title that really matters -- "Mother."


On Tuesday, March 12th, I went to work (disobeying bed rest), and I stayed up for a long time. I joked with my co-workers that if I didn't send myself into labor by running around the office, my plan was to make sure my blood pressure was high enough that they would induce me at my appointment the next day.  I thought I was only kidding, and that my romp around the office would have no affect on my next day's appointment.  I had reached that point where I wasn't sure Trace would ever arrive on his own volition, and I was going to have to wait until my due date, at least.  However, I am super thankful that I went ahead and put our hospital bag in the car and insisted Jefforey get a sub and come with me "just in case."

The birth of our sweet baby boy began with a routine weekly visit to Dr. Pryzybysz on the chilly morning of Wednesday, March 13th.  As you may have read, I had been on bedrest for what seemed like FOREVER with little reason other than a lot of symptoms of preeclampsia, but no real diagnosis of any kind.  I was beginning to feel like a crazy hypochondriac because at every appointment, they said my numbers were good, and everything looked fine. They were just monitoring me extra closely because of our family history and my symptoms.  Although, I was assured everything was normal and healthy during every visit, I still left every week feeling like something just wasn't quite right. So I insisted on extra tests and monitoring, and now...I am really glad that I did.  The week before, I had practically begged for a growth scan because I couldn't shake the ominous feeling that something wasn't right. During this visit, we learned that I was dilated to a 1, but not effaced much at all yet.  I was a little let down that I wasn't progressing enough to warrant a "stay here, and we'll just go ahead and induce you" conversation from my doctor.  (I was READY to have this baby!)  I reminded my doctor that she said we would do a growth scan this week because I was very concerned that the fundal measurement hadn't changed in 4 weeks.  She had the nurse take me to ultrasound, and from the look on the ultrasound tech's face, I could tell something wasn't quite right.  Even though she wasn't supposed to, she told us the measurements-- our amniotic fluid level was low-- and what it meant.  She said, "I would bet you are going to have this baby today without a doubt."  So then, we got really excited... and scared because it meant things weren't perfectly healthy anymore.

After my doctor saw the results, she let us know that while a healthy fluid level was once 10-20, "normal" is now considered anywhere from 5-20. Ours was a 4.  There was also a new type of test that UAB was using, which meant it was the new industry standard that said another measurement could be 1.5.  Ours was 1.7, so technically... we were still "normal," but because of the other symptoms, etc.  they wanted to send me down to labor and delivery for a few more tests. Dr. P said that we had 2 options: 1- admit me, and pump me full of fluids to see if maybe I was just dehydrated, which is why the levels were low or 2- go ahead and start the induction process that afternoon to be safe.  I was ALL for option 2!  

I met my fantastic nurse, Candis, (who would care for me over the next few days) at the Labor & Delivery admission desk.  She was absolutely phenomenal.  (All of our care team was, and I could kick myself for not getting pictures with them!)  We hung out and did lots of tests in triage, then they admitted us to room 309, which became our home for the next 5 days. 

 Unfortunately for me, the next couple of days were sort of trying. I'm NOT a patient "waiter".  Later that day, we learned that Dr. McKee (another physician in the practice who was on call) had recommended waiting to induce labor to see if my amniotic fluid levels rose as a result of the 3 bags of fluid they would pump me with in the next 12 hours.  Because of the "wait-and-see" mode we were in, we didn't want our parents making the trip to Birmingham, so we just hung out at the hospital without ANYTHING to do.  I had left my work bag at home that morning (for the first time ever), and it had our phone chargers in it, among other things that would have been oh so helpful during that torturous wait.  Thankfully, we had some dear friends visit to help us pass the time!  Thank you, Ericka and Rusty. And a big shout out to one of my favorite people on the planet, my old boss and unrelated precious friend, Aimee, who brought me a phone charger and her iPad. We survived a LONG night of waiting!

Thursday morning, Dr. McKee came in, and said that a) I was NOT dilated to a 1, Dr. P was optimistic and b) the 3 bags of fluid basically did nothing. My AF level was about 4.5, so that meant that my placenta was no longer working properly, and we needed to have a baby!  He also prepared us that he figured we would have to have a C Section because he didn't see my labor progressing quickly enough to prevent harm to the baby.  However, we were going to have to wait (yet again) until around 8 p.m. when they would begin the induction process with Cytotech (it's a cervical "ripening" agent.  Yummy.) and start the pitocin and break my water on Friday morning.   So he wanted me up and moving during the day... they took off the monitors, which after hearing all that I'd just heard...scared me to death.   But regardless, I did make my way around the hospital that day... visited the gift shop, bought some books (which good gracious.. we should have done the day before!) even got a birthing ball to try and convince Trace he needed to make his way!

Friday morning, Dr. Ellis was on call, and she came in planning to break my water around 5:30 a.m. IF my cervix was "ripening."  Now, let me just tell you... pregnancy causes you to no longer believe in the term TMI, so I had no shame in sending a text to my "baby news" groups of contacts asking them to please pray for my cervix to ripen. :)    Since we were afraid we'd be having a c section around 6-7 a.m. on Friday morning... our families came early!  My parents spent the night in Birmingham the night before so they could be around for all the action.  Jeff, Katie, Denise and Karen arrived at the hospital by 5:30 a.m.  Thankfully, God heard our prayers, and we were able to progress with a vaginal delivery childbirth plan.  I was very excited that after what seemed like endless waiting, we were going to have a baby that day!  I had always heard horror stories about the breaking of the water, but it really wasn't so bad.  And we realized how precious little fluid I really had, which was sad.  Shortly after the breaking of the water, I was feeling like a champ because I was handling things quite well.  They started the pitocin drip around 6 a.m., and things changed QUICKLY! Apparently, the cytotech and pitocin combo in my body was NOT tolerated well. I had intense "clustered" contractions, which meant that unlike normal labor... my contractions started at the most intense and never eased up.  I didn't have "5 min. apart...4 min. apart..." with contractions gradually getting closer and more intense.  I had "no minutes apart" from minute 1! My blood pressure was increasing, and Trace wasn't tolerating the contractions well, so they put my on oxygen around 6:15 a.m., and I stayed on it until about 3 p.m. after Trace was born.  NO fun. And it mean that I never got to put on any make up for those "after birth" pictures like I had planned.  Also, I didn't get to talk with people and stuff for the next several hours because of that annoying mask.

I have the utmost respect for my friends that choose to labor naturally, but I figured out very quickly that I was not going to be able to join them (not that I planned to).  I felt like a weenie.  Although, I had not planned to have any type of medication other than the epidural, which I planned to get when I was dilated to a 3 so I would not have to increase the risk of a C section-- I ended up getting Stadol (sp?) around 7 and epidural around 9, when I wasn't yet dilated to a 3.  My nurses and doctor strongly encouraged me to get the epidural because my contractions were so intense and my BP got dangerously high.  With the epidural, my BP bottomed out. So within a few minutes, I went from 160/90 to 88/48 or so.  It was rough.

From 9:30 a.m.- 2 p.m., we basically took turns in MANY different laboring positions trying to find a position that Trace liked.  Oddly enough, the position he seemed to prefer was almost as if I were standing up-- the bed was raised as vertically as posible with my deadfish legs hanging down. It was kind of funny.  We were experiencing heart wrenching "decels" or decelerations of Trace's heart beat.  This was easily the most terrifying thing I have ever experienced.  We would be hearing his strong 140-150ish bpm heart rate then it would drop off... bub bum, bub bum, bub bum... bub bum..........bub bum.  His cord was compressed at variable intervals during the labor-- before, during and after contractions.  We had two great nurses that never left our sides, and I felt very confident in their abilities-- I will be forever grateful for Kathryn and Demi! Sweet Candis was off starting on Friday, but she called multiple times to check on me.  And she was the one that made sure we had a great nurse... although, I'm certain that was an easy task.  We had such competent and compassionate care. I cannot say enough positive things about our experience at St. Vincent's!

Since I was on oxygen, our many guests were asked to stay in the waiting room. It was nerve wrecking to hear the heartbeat drop off like it did so frequently, and I didn't want anyone else to have to be nervous.... and I didn't want to have to feign confidence for anyone. I was scared to death, and I didn't want to make it difficult for anyone else.  Plus, I was tempted to remove my mask to "entertain" folks, so around 9 a.m., we decided it was best if it were just me and Jefforey in the room from that point forward.  So we listened to really good music, and we prayed a lot!  I wish I could say that they were really elegant or thoughtful prayers, but most the time it was simply.. "God, please help him. Help me! Keep us safe! I'm scared."  Like a child frightened by a thunderstorm, this storm of my life had me crawling into my heavenly Daddy's lap just to tell him I was scared.

At first, things progressed kind of slowly. I was just dilated to a 3 at 10 a.m.  I thought it was going to be a really long process, and that we would meet a new round of nurses at 3 p.m. who would help us welcome our baby (hopefully), and we had resigned ourselves to the fact that our sweet nurses that we were growing to love wouldn't be around for the end game.  I was not excited at the prospect of facing a shift change and having to live without a nurse even for a minute!  But around noon, I guess, things started picking up... including the decels :(  Kathryn said several times.. "if___  keeps happening, we will do an emergency c section." So we were on the edge for several hours.  Then around 1:30, I was dilated to a 9.5, and we needed to get me to a 10 because Trace was not tolerating labor.  So she intervened a little, and with the next contraction... I was at a 10 and ready to push.  As they were prepping the room for the big show, we had a great moment with Jesus.  Jefforey and I prayed together, and one of my favorite praise and worship songs was playing on our iPod, and "the peace that surpasses all understanding" had definitely come over me! A big shout out to my music loving husband who put together the most amazing labor playlist!  Although, I really wanted him to put "Ah Push It" by Salt N Pepa for this particular stage in the game, (he refused to do something so "cute"), I was really thankful for the song that was playing instead!

Dr. Christine arrived around 2, and we started pushing.  She explained that they may need to use forceps because it was time to get him out, and I agreed!  I think we had 3-4 big pushes. I had to stop twice because I almost passed out. I remember fading into that dark tunnel of fainting, and losing the ability to hear/see temporarily.  Jefforey was so strong through it all. I never knew he was apparently more terrified than I was.  During the pushing, our nurses tried to keep it light.  Kathryn laughed at me, and said I was deceptively strong because she was explaining how to push, and said "try to pull me into the bed with you"-- which I almost did.  All of the scary moments were forgotten at 2:39 p.m. when we got our first glimpse of Trace Parker Morgan. It's such a weird feeling.  With an epidural, you don't feel much, but you can feel the pressure of the baby in the birth canal.  And you can feel glorious release when they come out! I could tell that Trace was out, but I hadn't seen him yet, but I saw the relief on Jefforey's face.  My heart still hadn't started beating again as I waited what seemed like 5 minutes to hear him cry.  The nurses whisked him away to the warmer on the other side of the room (since he was in distress, Jefforey wasn't allowed to cut the cord), little did I realize at the time that because my crazy cord was so long... he was actually still attached!  The first thing I can remember hearing the nurses say was "Look how long and pretty his eyelashes are!"  to which I might have replied- "Who cares about his eyelashes! Why isn't he crying?!  Is he ok!?"

Then, he started crying and they brought him over to me.  And in that moment, the world stopped, flipped over a few times and then kept turning forever altered!  His tiny little squeaky cry melted my heart, but one look in those beautiful eyes that seemed so anxious to capture every detail of my face on through to my soul was just all it took.  I was a mom!  I knew instantaneously that nothing else in the world would ever matter as much as meeting this tiny little 6 lb. 4 oz, 21 inch human's every need. It is unbelievable how quickly everything changes.  As much as I'd like to capture those emotions with words... I am still speechless at that incredible feeling. He was HERE safe and sound!  I was ecstatic.  I just cried and held him and warmed from the inside out that his squeaky "uh huh" cry was quieted just by my voice.  They had to take him away again to check him out more fully since he'd been in distress, but they assured me everything seemed perfect.

I never want to forget the sweetness of that face.

 Dr. Christine continued to work on me.. delivering the placenta and then stitching me up for what seemed like an eternity.  I never asked how many stitches, and I never so much as glimpsed down there. I didn't want to know.  Ignorance was bliss (until the feeling came back anyway).  She told me I had a 2nd degree internal tear, and a 2nd degree episiotomy ,but it could have been much worse.  She also told me that we had a 2 vessel cord (which happened to be the longest she had ever seen in her long career) and my placenta didn't look right, so she sent both off to pathology.  After she left, we had the most precious time... just the three of us. Well, and the nurses that came and went...(cleaning up very efficiently might I add!)

Our first family photo- woof.

After our family time, we finally let the visitors in to take their turns.  First, they got to watch his first bath.

After his first bath, his AU hat was "conveniently" the only one that fit :)

He had to go back under the warmer once because he had a tough time regulating his temp at first.

The next 2 days were such a flurry of activity and visitors wanting to catch a glimpse at the boy who stole our hearts.  I don't remember a lot of it, honestly.  Not sure if it was the pain meds, the emotional rollercoaster brought on by the drastic hormonal shift, the difficult time we had trying to get the boy to eat, the utter physical/mental/emotional exhaustion of it all... or a combination of all those factors.  But thankfully, someone took pictures!  It was overwhelming.

Dear friends, Caleb & Erin, getting a little practice before they welcome their own!

Jefforey's aunt Teleah, and cousin, Molly Kate waited patiently for their turns!

He had such a strong "startle" reflex at first.

Grumps and Katie were very excited!

Candice holding both our boys.  Easton is about 6 weeks older.

sweet little hands and feet

Trace and Paw Paw

Aunt Karen was very excited!  Still sad that the police dept wouldn't let Corey take off to be there.

Big cousins-- Aubrey is exactly 2 months older; Andrew is 6 years

Sara K. got to see him before they headed to Disney the next day!  He had cooperated so she could be there ;)

He was so very sleepy after his arrival.  He didn't want to eat for several days, which was no fun for me.

He is Granna's little buddy.

All in all, it was a successful experience because the end result is a perfectly healthy baby boy.  It didn't go as we had hoped or envisioned necessarily, but when does it ever?!  On Sunday, March 17th, we were given the OK to leave the hospital.  We were told to take our time, and we did.  We had to leave by 3 p.m. according to insurance.  This was our first experience in learning that EVERYTHING takes longer with a baby. So we actually were a little late leaving, but it was ok.

He was waaaay too skinny for his original "going home" outfit, so we had to settle for a preemie outfit Aunt Sissy picked up on her last visit to the hospital.

Loading him up for the long ride home, for which... he was a champ.

We were welcomed home by lots of our family who had anxiously awaited our arrival.  It was a special day... and an exhausting one.  God really gives you a new capacity for love and exhaustion when he gives you a baby!  We feel so honored, and it's our prayer that we will be worthy of the calling to be parents!

2 Corinthians 9:15 Thanks be to God for his indescribable gift!